Introduction: The Myth of the Breakthrough
When people walk into therapy, they often expect an “aha” moment that changes everything overnight. They imagine leaving one session with the clouds parting, the perfect solution clear, and their struggles forever behind them.
But here’s the truth: those lightning-bolt breakthroughs are rare. Most real, lasting growth doesn’t happen in one dramatic moment. It happens slowly, in the daily decisions we make, the tiny shifts we practice, and the small wins we build upon.
As a therapist, I’ve seen this over and over again. The clients who transform their lives aren’t the ones chasing massive breakthroughs. They’re the ones who celebrate small victories and keep stacking them, one on top of another.
In this post, we’ll explore why small wins matter more than big breakthroughs—and how you can start noticing and celebrating them in your own growth journey.
The Problem with Chasing Breakthroughs
Let’s be honest: big breakthroughs sound exciting. Who doesn’t want that one magical moment when everything suddenly makes sense?
But there are three problems with relying on breakthroughs for growth:
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They’re rare. If you only measure progress by giant leaps, you’ll feel stuck most of the time.
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They’re unsustainable. Even if you do have a breakthrough, maintaining the change requires daily habits, not one-time inspiration.
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They set you up for disappointment. When progress doesn’t come as fast as you hoped, it’s easy to feel like you’re failing.
Think of it like exercise. One intense workout won’t transform your body. But consistent movement, even 20 minutes a day, adds up to real change.
Therapist’s truth: Growth is less about epiphanies and more about persistence.
Why Small Wins Are So Powerful
So why do small wins matter so much? Here are three reasons:
1. Small Wins Create Momentum
Each time you take a small step, you prove to yourself that change is possible. That builds confidence and motivation.
Example: Journaling for 5 minutes every morning may not feel life-changing in the moment, but after a month, you’ll see patterns in your thoughts and notice how your mornings feel calmer.
2. Small Wins Rewire Your Brain
Neuroscience shows us that habits shape pathways in the brain. Every time you repeat a positive action, you strengthen that pathway, making it easier next time.
Example: Choosing to pause before reacting in anger—even once—teaches your brain a new option. Repeat it often enough, and staying calm becomes second nature.
3. Small Wins Build Sustainability
Anyone can make a big change for a week. But true growth is about what lasts. Small wins are easier to maintain, and when stacked over time, they lead to profound transformation.
Example: Saving $20 a week may not feel like much, but over time, it creates financial security and a new relationship with money.
The Therapist’s Chair: Stories of Small Wins
In therapy, I see the magic of small wins every day:
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The anxious client who practices one breathing technique before a meeting. That small win leads to less panic and more confidence.
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The couple in conflict who try listening without interrupting for five minutes. That small win builds trust and softens their conversations.
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The overwhelmed parent who takes 10 minutes to themselves after the kids go to bed. That small win replenishes patience and reduces burnout.
None of these changes look dramatic in the moment. But over weeks and months, they add up to transformation.
How to Start Celebrating Small Wins
So how can you apply this in your own growth journey? Here are three steps:
1. Define What a Small Win Looks Like for You
Don’t overcomplicate it. Ask yourself: What’s one tiny thing I can do today that moves me toward the person I want to be?
Examples:
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Sending one kind text.
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Drinking one extra glass of water.
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Saying no to one thing that drains you.
2. Keep Track of Them
Our brains love evidence. Write down your small wins in a notebook, an app, or even a sticky note on the fridge. When you see them pile up, you’ll realize how much you’re growing.
3. Celebrate Them
Don’t dismiss your progress because it feels “small.” Celebrate it. Smile, share it with someone you trust, or give yourself a reward. The celebration reinforces the behavior.
Reframing Growth: From Big Leaps to Daily Steps
Here’s the reframe:
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Growth isn’t about a finish line.
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Growth isn’t about massive leaps.
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Growth is about showing up, step by step, and recognizing that every small win counts.
Over time, those wins compound. They change your mindset, your habits, your relationships, and ultimately, your life.
The Therapist’s Reminder: Be Gentle with Yourself
Sometimes, clients tell me, “But it’s just a small step… it doesn’t feel like enough.”Here’s what I remind them: Small steps are still steps forward. Healing, growth, and development aren’t sprints. They’re marathons. And every single mile marker matters.
So be gentle with yourself. Progress is progress, no matter how small.
Conclusion: Victory in the Small Things
The victory isn’t in waiting for a life-changing moment. The victory is in noticing, celebrating, and stacking your small wins every day.
So this week, ask yourself: What’s one small win I can create today? Then do it, celebrate it, and let it build the momentum you need for lasting growth.
Because in the end, small wins matter more than big breakthroughs.
If you’re tired of waiting for a “big breakthrough” and want support in celebrating and building small wins, therapy can help. Together, we’ll create a path of sustainable growth that actually lasts. Book a session today.
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